WONDER FILE: Infomercial Review

As a former comic book addict, every time I hear the word “Super,” I think of comic book characters and situations. You know why: There was a Superman, Supergirl, Superboy, Super Woman, even Krypto, the Super Dog. And the same thing holds true for “Wonder.” when I saw the commercial for “Wonder File,” the superhero freak inside of me wondered what kind of super device this was. After all, there's a Wonder Woman. Could this be a place to store her magic lasso and her golden bracelets? There's a Wonder Girl, who is basically the kid counterpart of Wonder Woman. I remember a Wonder Man. Heck, there was even a 1970s TV show that featured “Wendy, Marvin, Wonder Dog, and the Wonder Twins.”

There must something magical to “Wonder File.”

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Uh—no such luck. Wonder File turns out to be an organizer that helps you get rid of a lot of clutter on your desk.

Having said that, Wonder File, though human, is an extraordinary thing. It's basically this folder that opens up onto your desk and spreads out like a mat. But it's a mat with all sorts of nifty little pockets and holders. Perfect for organizing your important papers, pens, pencils, even your calculator or laptop computer. It really is a “wonder” to behold!” The commercial even shows kids using it on the floor to hold their activity items, such as workbooks, coloring books, crayons, and more.

And here's my dirty little secret: All of those old comic books that I was supposed to have given up when I became an adult—it even works for organizing them. Imagine: Wonder Woman inside the Wonder File. Nothing could be more perfect.

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ANTHONY MORRISON’S ‘ADVERTISING PROFITS FROM HOME: Infomercial Review

If you watch much late-night television, then you’ve probably seen the infomercial for Anthony Morrison’s program, “Advertising Profits From Home.” This is a program that shows you common-sense ways of making money online, especially focusing on the use of affiliate programs. I had stumbled onto some of the secrets he shared already, and can attest to the fact that this is not a get-rich-quick scheme, but is a proven method of making money. A quick search online will take you to hundreds of people who have used his program effectively.

So why do I get so angry every time I see Anthony Morrison on TV? I wondered about this for quite some time. And then it hit me: This guy is a kid. He looks like he just came from a Boy Scout outing, yet he has started thirty successful businesses in his lifetime. I’ve tried and tried to start my own businesses and finally managed to get one that kind of, sort of pays the bills with my freelance writing. And I’m in my 40s. There’s just something about a smarmy kid who is 30 or 40 times more successful than I am that just doesn’t seem right.

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But let’s try to be objective here. If you’re not put off by smarmy kids and you just want results, you'll want to check out what Anthony Morrison has to offer. When you read it and hear it, you'll have an “Of course!” moment: “Of course! That just makes sense!” And you'll wonder why you hadn't thought of it yourself.

The sad news: If you had thought of it, you could be the benefactor of 30 businesses instead of some show-off boy scout. But there's always next year. If you want next year to be better than this year, you'll want to hear what Mr. Morrison has to say.

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WATER JET: Infomercial Review

I wonder if anyone actually ever has that dirty of a garage door? Seriously, watch the infomercial. I know they are just trying to show the handiness and the versatility of the Water Jet, but really. Has anyone ever seen a lawn chair that dirty, or have fake shutters that get that dusty? Plus, I think they could have come up with some better ideas then just washing off your wheels on your car or your windows because everything they did in this infomercial I could have done simply by placing my thumb firmly over the nozzle of the hose and adjust the pressure accordingly, and you know what is the best part about the thumb over the nozzle method. It is free. Even if I was unfortunate enough to lose one, nature has seen fit to grace me with a spare. Although if you are missing a thumb I bet there is a great story behind that and I would love to hear it.

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I digress, the Water Jet does do a few things though that my thumb cannot. It at least appears that the Water Jet will help you clean your patio cracks really well. I don’t think that no matter how much I tried, I could ever get enough pressure built up to constrict the water flow so tightly that it would clean out the cracks in concrete. They got me beat on that front.

And let me bring up one more point though for those old school thumbers like me out there. With all this global warming that is happening and conservation that should be taking place, I believe that the thumb over the nozzle trick is a little more wasteful then the Water Jet ever could be. So does saving water, or maybe more importantly saving money on my water bill, really matter when were talking twenty bucks for the Water Jet? I would have the answer that with a yes, yes it is.

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ORGREENIC: Infomercial Review

The first thing you should know about Orgreenic is that there's nothing in its awkward name that tells you at all what the product is or what its various benefits are. This is, after all, at heart a frying pan. “Green?'' Doesn't appear to be to me. “ORG?” You can doubtless think of lots of interesting words that begin with “org,” some clean, others not so clean, but none of which have much in common with a frying pan.

Okay, so it has a bad name. That doesn't change the fact that Orgreenic itself is simply the most amazing frying pan you've ever seen. I know because I have it. And I'm convinced that it's impossible to get any food item to stick to this pan! Super Glue would probably slide off of it.

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Still, the TV commercial for Orgreenic strikes me as a bit silly. Not to mention disgusting. Who is this guy at the start of the commercial who has so much trouble frying an egg that more of it sticks to the pan than to the spatula? Here's a hint, sir: If you don't have the Orgreenic, then at least use some Pam or some cooking oil.

But the guy who has Orgreenic is almost as silly as the first one. This guy didn't buy Orgreenic to do serious cooking. He bought it to play. He fries an egg and then slides it around the pan—around and around. At one point, it almost slid right onto the floor! Then, when it's pancake time, more playing: He BLEW the pancake out of the Orgreenic onto a plate.

He concludes his little show by taking the Orgreenic and pounding another frying pan until the inferior pan is left all dented up. I suppose he never thought that Goodwill would have welcomed that pan as a donation. Hey, Goodwill needs all the pans they can get, because you can bet nobody will be donating the awesome Orgreenic pan.

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