TITAN PEELER: Infomercial Review

I'm always fascinated by the names they give to products that are sold on those late-night infomercials. For instance, do you remember the GINSU KNIFE? I'm positive that no American knows what 'ginsu" means, but just think it sounds Japanese. And for some reason, maybe pertaining to samurais and ninjas, we think of sharp blades when we think of Ginsus. There was also the Veg-a-Matic, which did indeed slice vegetables, but since it was totally hand-powered, there was nothing automatic about it.

And now we have the Titan Peeler. "Titan" means "giant; big and powerful." So of course, one of the selling points of Titan Peeler is that it's so....SMALL and easy-to-handle. Makes perfect sense in infomercial-land.

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This is one of several infomercial items I have personally bought. I did it because I'm lazy and Titan Peeler does a great job of slicing and peeling things in considerably less time. But I bought it before I saw the commercial. Good thing, because the commercial would not have caused me to buy.

For starters, I'm insulted by their having this guy with an Australian accent promoting the product. In fact, more and more people think that British or Australian accents are good for selling food products. Am I, because I'm American, considered inept in the kitchen? (I'm a total expert with the microwave).

But the one part of the commercial that I like is the question that opens it: "Do you want to peel and slice vegetables in an instant?" To which I reply, "No, I don't want to peel and slice them at all."

But since NOT peeling them is not an option, doing it faster is better than nothing. And that's why I love the Titan Peeler. Because laziness is my curse.

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Brazilian Secret: Infomercial Review

I consider my self to be a great, non-shallow, albeit nice guy. Most guys out there will probably say that about themselves as well. However, to be perfectly honest, a woman’s figure is still a huge part in how attractive other people find her. I know how bad that sounds, but when you go out to a bar, people don’t notice how personable you are from across the way. That part comes later. It all starts with a quick up and down glance that sparks interest, at least from the man’s point of view.

I however try not to do this too much. If my girlfriend were to catch me looking around (just looking) I would be in big trouble. Anyways, I feel I am off topic. My favorite thing physically on my girlfriend would have to be, well, her butt. It just kinda drives me crazy. Without getting too descriptive, she looks really good in jeans. But for some reason, women, no matter how beautiful, can always nit pick and come up with flaws that aren’t really there. Especially with makeup. She does not need to wear makeup, but she says it makes her feel better about herself. Doesn’t really make sense to me, but I am a guy. I was finally getting over the makeup thing when she comes home with this thing called the Brazilian Secret. Some special type of panty that lifts the caboose a bit and gives a more round appearance. I told her how much I liked the way she looked with out it, but then she tried them on for me. As my eyes got a little bigger than normal, I was, lets say pleasantly surprised with how well these panties worked.

I feel I musts restate what I have already said. I found no problems with how my girlfriend looked before and I don’t consider my self to be shallow. In fact I think she is gorgeous. However, the Brazilian Secret underwear is amazing. I would say the inventor of these panties ranks right up there with the inventor of the push up bra. I bet these guys get men buying them drinks all the time.

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WATER JET: Infomercial Review

I wonder if anyone actually ever has that dirty of a garage door? Seriously, watch the infomercial. I know they are just trying to show the handiness and the versatility of the Water Jet, but really. Has anyone ever seen a lawn chair that dirty, or have fake shutters that get that dusty? Plus, I think they could have come up with some better ideas then just washing off your wheels on your car or your windows because everything they did in this infomercial I could have done simply by placing my thumb firmly over the nozzle of the hose and adjust the pressure accordingly, and you know what is the best part about the thumb over the nozzle method. It is free. Even if I was unfortunate enough to lose one, nature has seen fit to grace me with a spare. Although if you are missing a thumb I bet there is a great story behind that and I would love to hear it.

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I digress, the Water Jet does do a few things though that my thumb cannot. It at least appears that the Water Jet will help you clean your patio cracks really well. I don’t think that no matter how much I tried, I could ever get enough pressure built up to constrict the water flow so tightly that it would clean out the cracks in concrete. They got me beat on that front.

And let me bring up one more point though for those old school thumbers like me out there. With all this global warming that is happening and conservation that should be taking place, I believe that the thumb over the nozzle trick is a little more wasteful then the Water Jet ever could be. So does saving water, or maybe more importantly saving money on my water bill, really matter when were talking twenty bucks for the Water Jet? I would have the answer that with a yes, yes it is.

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